Weeks like this...

... going into an incredibly busy week of shows, rehearsals, leading classes for other leaders who are working on other shows... long hours, little sanity, lots of details to remember, many children clamoring for attention, family desiring more than "hi... good night", expectations everywhere, little space for any thought, preparation and processings on a personal level. :)

In weeks like this, it's easy to try and grab hold of anything that make me feel like *I'm* the one in control, if *I* just work hard enough, everything will be fine, *I* need to make sure *I* do everything right...

Hold on, there. Grace, Miss *I*. Rest in His strength, because *I* will never be enough. It's alright to word hard, to press on and press for excellence... and it's definitely not ok to just throw up your hands and let things run without order or reason. At the same time, (it seems especially) in weeks like these I have to remind myself to *just breathe* and remember *I* am not the one that's ultimately spinning the Universe. Haha. What a funny thought. Yet how often do my actions make me look like I believe that? I pray this week will see a minimum of those occurrences... and the greatest amount of time will be spent resting in the Lord's strength and grace to press forward.

Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain
Leave to thy God to order and provide
In every change He faithful will remain
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end

In other news...



Have a wonder-full week!

Art, Beauty

I feel like life is SO busy right now. I'm doing many wonderful things. My students have quite quickly become a HUGE part of my life. Every day I'm teaching one place or another. There's days that it gets stressful... but I feel so blessed to have work - and not just any old work, but work that I love. Work where I get to help others discover how to use their God-given creative spirits to the fullest potential!

I get really passionate when I think about art, creativity and our Creator. I came across an article by T.M. Moore not too long ago and have included below a short excerpt from "Why Art Matters".

Why does God consider art so important that He made such varied use of it for communicating His will to His people?

Many reasons come to mind: art’s ability to appeal to the imagination and engage the affections; its value as an aid to memory; the balance between form and freedom inherent in the arts, suggesting both parameters and liberties for our lives; the experience of delight and pleasure art can provide; the universal appeal of art; and so forth. Far from being a mere frill, art has always played a central role in human society. Their souls are impoverished, as is their experience of life, for whom art has little importance.

But by far the greatest value of the arts to the Christian is their ability to nurture the sense of beauty and, thus, to train our hearts and minds to know, enjoy, and relate better to Him who is the Perfection of Beauty. Modern and postmodern artists have so relativized the concept of beauty that even to discuss its role in the arts is to risk appearing passé or uninformed. But this is a strictly recent phenomenon. The history of art is replete with discussions of beauty and its importance in the arts, and, where Christians have entered those discussions, they have argued for the role of art in nurturing our sense of beauty and helping us to know and worship God.

This is exactly why I love art and creativity in all its forms. True art has the ability to slice through barriers to bring us directly to the brilliance and beauty of our Lord. By revealing the Truth (and exposing the opposite for what it really is) we are able to revel and thrive in His gracious love... and beauty. This, to me, is what makes any art worth doing and working and being. I love it. Michael Card, Madeleine L'Engle and Calvin Seerveld have also written some amazing things on this topic. I may quote them in later posts. Suffice it to say I get so excited reading, conversing, discussing, doing... and teaching about these very things.

Thank you, Lord, for giving us the spark of the imagination and creative vision!!!

Ode to a Parking Lot Attendant (October 2008)

I know not, sir, quite how much time you might have on your hands
With such an illustrious job you execute on Thursday's stands
What joy you have in granting entrance to eligible beings
What power lies in your position, fulfilling and so freeing!

I know you are quite busy, keeping faithful watch each moment
You might not have much time to read this poor attempt at sonnet
I openly admit I'm not a poet or magician
Especially when writing for illustrious personage

Forgive me then, most honored sir, when feelings took the dive
As I was pulling in last week to teach my class of five
I work quite hard, get little thanks and even smaller earnings
And now I'm pegged quite negatively as a child's help for learning?

What made you think, if I may ask, I teach for my profession?
Was it the color of my eyes, or perhaps my clothing choices?
Surely you couldn't help but notice my less-than-athlete's figure
I admit I don't run twenty miles to give me verve and vigor.

But! I'm proud to be a teacher - love my students through and through
Providing them with tools to brighten home and life - who knew?!
Music, such a treasured gift to share with those around
So why, then, was I mortified from your pronouncement loud?

Quite the knowing tone of voice, the looking down your nose
As you proclaimed my fate, forever pegged as one of "those"
I couldn't help but wonder how many others you have slighted
Categorized and boxed away, because you are short-sighted

I beg you not to make this same mistake through all your days
For teachers change the lives of those whose minds they set ablaze
The spark of knowledge mixed with passion - oh, the combination
Can forever steer one's course in life - a precious education.

I'm sorry if you had a horrid time in school and such
I can't pretend all educators have students' best at heart
But next time you decide a person looks to be a teacher
Your gentler realization would be much appreciated.

Losing my religion?

What is church?

What is it? What should it be? Should church have a "should be" tag attached?

"Losing our religion"... if religion is defined as "a set of beliefs which characterizes how one lives"... how Jesus lived was just as beautiful as how he died... and resurrected. How we live DOES matter to God. I don't want to "lose my religion". That doesn't even make sense. It might sound cool to some... but that someone is not me.

Melt Away...

Endless driving, silence burns
Rhythmic pain slowly turns
A warming rush, gazing eyes
Lives unite, stopping time

Fleeting moment melts away
Reaching out, begs to stay
Oh...

Paper airplane sharply glides
Missed its mark, crashing high
Damning strength, stubborn will
Guarding scars, crouching still

The freeing moments melt away
Still reaching - begs to stay
Oh....

Peel back layers - years of lies
Dried-on, tearing, ripping, cries
Searching for the life beneath
Carried to the mercy seat

Fleeting moments melt away...
Wanting to stay...
Oh...

On church and conflict within my spirit

There is no perfect church.

Please, Father, make me an agent for Your kingdom in this world, on this day, in this place.


Where am I today? I wish that I knew
'Cause looking around there's no sign of you
I don't remember one jump or one leap
Just quiet steps away from your lead

I'm holding my heart out but clutching it too
Feeling this short of a love that we once knew
I'm calling this home when it's not even close
Playing the role with nerves left exposed

Standing on a darkened stage, stumbling through the lines
Others have excuses, but I have my reasons why

We get distracted by dreams of our own
But nobody's happy while feeling alone
And knowing how hard it hurts when we fall
We lean another ladder against the wrong wall

And climb high to the highest rung, to shake fists at the sky
While others have excuses, I have my reasons why

With so much deception it's hard not to wander away. ~Nickel Creek~

John 15:13 (October 2007)

Recently I heard a speaker reference John 15:12-13... "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."

He went on to say that the original word "life" used in verse 13, translated, actually means "psyche". So... Jesus isn't actually saying the greatest love is to lay down our physical lives for each other. In some ways, I think that dying for someone could be easier (and most likely quicker) than what He is actually asking us... he's saying we need to lay aside our own personal desires and selfish wishes in deference to others. He's saying we need to live to serve others. Not die for them... live for them. There was no clause to that verse, no clarifications or exceptions... just "lay down your life for your friends." Yikes.

I fail that one countless times each day...